Tag: empower

Your Sexual Past – Does it Bother your Boyfriend?

The last thing your boyfriend wants to think about is another guy having been with you (whether we’re talking about sex or just hooking up). Envisioning some other guy getting down with you can literally drive him crazy. 

Have you had a checkered sexual history that’s filled with lots of experience? If so, your boyfriend might have trouble dealing with this. But this is something that he must accept. 

Don’t you dare let someone else throw your past in your face or hold it against you. If it’s ancient history (or only a few months ago), let it stay there, and move on. 

He must accept you for all that you areIf he’s chosen to be with you…he needs to accept you for all that you are. And that means everything. It doesn’t mean he has to like your sexual history, of course, but it means he can’t hold it against you. It’s completely unfair for him to want to date you and then start knit-picking about details from your past. 

If he’s constantly bringing up your pastTell him flat out that he’s going to have to accept everything about you if he wants to date you. Let him know he has two choices: 

a) You two break up 

b) You two stay together…but he can never mention your sexual past ever again. Never. Not even when you two are fighting. 

Learn from your mistakes and move onThe few moments of pleasure that come from sex and hooking up can have a permanent effect on you reputation and self-esteem. If you’ve chosen to change your “free loving” ways, you’re doing the right thing and that’s what matters most. On the other hand, if youve only had a few hookup and your man is making a major issue about it, you might want to rethink whether you really need to date such a puritanical person.

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Every Baby Step Forward is Still a Step Forward

Let’s get one thing clear, we have been conditioned by society and technology to expect big results in as little time as possible. Anything from 15 minute pizza delivery guarantees to 2 day prime Amazon deliveries to instant online downloads, we want the biggest and best things in life in minutes. In fact, some of us have become so impatient that we expect the very best things life has to offer delivered yesterday. Talking about setting ourselves up for a letdown.

There are many challenges in your life that will take quite a bit of effort, attention and energy. You may be going through school. You may be trying to earn a degree. You may be trying to get your dream job. You may be trying to convince your boss to give you a well earned raise or promotion.

Whatever form the challenge takes, please understand that it’s something you have to work on. It’s something that often takes a long time. This is what trips many people up.

We live in a world that is increasingly impatient. As recently as 10 years ago, it was perfectly acceptable for pizza shops to deliver pizza in 30 minutes or else it’s 100% free. Do you think that’s still the case in most metropolitan areas in the United States? Absolutely not.

Today, we have reached a point where if your pizza guy does not deliver your pie within 15 minutes, you expect a refund because you want that pie to be absolutely free. That’s how impatient we have become.

This is why the concept of some sort of long journey towards expertise, credibility and authority is very irritating to a lot of people. 9 times out of 10, people would rather dispense with the process of paying their dues.

You have to understand that you can’t become some sort of overnight expert. You can read all the books in the world regarding a particular subject, but you’re not going to be an expert in that subject until you actually carry out that information.

For example, if you are a lawyer and you spent a lot of time in law school reading everything you know about personal injury, all the theory in the world, regardless of how many bits and pieces of information you have managed to memorize, are not going to help you when it comes to deposing the other side, talking to a huge number of claims adjusters and eventually taking your case to trial.

There’s a big divide or disconnect between theory and practice. This is why it’s always a good idea to not assume that just because you learned certain things that it will automatically or magically transform you. Focus instead on each baby step forward you take. Each step is a victory.

It may seem small and it may seem irritatingly long, but you shouldn’t be impatient. Each baby step forward you take is still a step forward.